


if i could choose i wouldnt choose you

by holidaycafe



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff, M/M, nothing i write is serious is it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-12
Updated: 2018-05-12
Packaged: 2019-05-05 23:20:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14629146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holidaycafe/pseuds/holidaycafe
Summary: No one chooses who they fall in love with and Donghyuck knows that if he had the choice he wouldnt be in love with his best friend.





	if i could choose i wouldnt choose you

They were childhood friends. Donghyuck vividly remembers the day they had met on the first day of preschool. Donghyuck had been crying, begging his mom to stay because he was worried no one would like him. Mark, being the kind person he is, decided to ask the crying boy to be his friend which resulted in Donghyuck not leaving his side until Mark had to go to high school while Donghyuck finsihed middle school. 

Mark had been there through Donghyucks “I wanna be a skater” phase where he bought a skate board and proceeded to fall unceremoniously every time he so much as put his foot on it. Donghyuck was there during Marks “I’m not emo I’m punk rock” phase (he was most definitely emo). During which he bought every My Chemical Romance poster in existence. Mark had accepted him when Donghyuck stuttered out that he was gay and Donghyuck had accepted him when he came out as bi (Mark had prepared a whole speech which Donghyuck still to this day doesnt understand). They had been each other’s best friends for as long as either could remember and that’s why Donghyucks newest revelation upset him so much.

He likes his best friend.

But he doesn’t like him in the “i wanna hang out with my best friend” kinda way he likes him in the “i want to take him on stupid dates and hold his hand and kiss him” kinda way and he hated it with every fiber of his being. 

“Why don’t you just confess?” Jaemin says unhelpfully when he told him after school one day. Donghyuck gives him an incredulous look “are you insane?” He rolls his eyes “‘oh Mark by the way I like you a lot more than a friend and would you go out with me?’ Yeah that’d work out great” jaemin sighs “it’s worth a shot though” “no it’s not” Donghyuck replies before turning back to the movie on tv signifying the end of that conversation. Jaemin only sighs deeper.

Jeno says the same thing a week later “just confess dude it’s not that hard” Donghyuck chokes on his coffee “I’m sorry what” he splutters. Jeno laughs at his confusion “jaemin told me you have a crush on our dear friend Mark” Donghyuck decides then and there he hates jaemin. “That asshole I swear one of these days I’m gonna kick his ass” Jeno laughs harder at that “anyways tell him. I’m sure he’ll understand” he says once he’s sobered up enough to get words out. “Understand? He wouldnt ‘understand’ he’d avoide me because who wants to be around someone they don’t have feelings for but the other person likes them? Exactly no one” jeno vaguely remembers Mark saying something along the lines of “Donghyucks so pretty i wish he knew I thought so” but decides its not worth telling his friend just yet.

Its been a month. A month of staring at Mark when he’s not looking, a month of Jeno and Jaemin telling all his friends besides Mark about his crush (“awh hyuck that’s adorable” “no it’s not Jisung it’s painful”), a month of hanging out with Mark wishing for more, and last but not least a month of practically nothing but rain. However the most notable thing about this month (in Donghyucks opinion) is when Mark thought he was cold so he gave him his sweater on the walk home. It had been a rather cold day and Donghyuck had purposely left his coat at home in hopes this would happen. (Donghyuck: 1 his better judgement: 0). 

Somewhere along the line Mark found out Donghyuck liked someone. “Hyuck we always tell each other everything why didn’t you tell me you liked someone” he said when he sat down at lunch. “Um well you see I didn’t think it really mattered all that much... plus he doesn’t go to our school!” Donghyuck added after Mark gave him the “everything’s important in its own right” look. “What’s his name” Mark asked catching Donghyuck off guard. “Renjun” their rival schools football team caption was the first name to come to mind. He glared at Chenle when he snorted, obviously trying to hide his laughter but ultimately failing. “Oh my god I knew it!” Mark said far too loudly for Donghyucks liking but what could he do. At least he didn’t know he likes him.

“So tell me about Renjun” Mark said as soon as they got to his house after school for their regular study session. “He’s really.... handsome?” Donghyuck cursed how unsure he sounded but Mark didn’t seem to notice. Renjun became Marks favourite conversation starter after that. “Is it better or worse that he doesn’t know” Jisung asked one day “I don’t really know but at least he’s not avoiding me” Donghyuck lied. He’d much rather Mark avoide him then constantly bring up Renjun but what else could he do? 

The past month was more painful than the one before it Donghyuck decided. Mark constantly bringing up Renjun and then listening as Donghyuck lies through his teeth about how amazing and handsome he is. Truth be told he would rather confess and have Mark avoide him at all costs instead of bringing Renjun up every two seconds. Lately though him saying things about Renjun seems to make Mark sad and he can’t figure out why. I mean he is the one bringing him up all the time. A part of Donghyucks brain says him looking sad is because he likes him back. Donghyuck decides that’s also the part of his brain that thought licking a whole bowl of sour cream clean for extra candy was a good idea. 

He mentions it to Jaemin which turns out to be a bad idea because Jaemin immediately tells him that Mark obviously likes him back and he should just confess. “As if” He retorts a frown on his face. 

On Monday Jeno has a ‘fantastic’ idea. “Put notes inside his locker!” He says excitedly. Donghyuck rolls his eyes good naturedly “sure why not” Donghyuck says and Jeno practically tackles Jaemin in an attempt to tell him the great news. The perks of being ambidextrous (but having less practice on your left hand) is being able to write love letters to Mark and not have him know that he’s the one writing them. Donghyuck knows it’s cheesy but he’s always been a sucker for cheesy things. The first letter reads ‘when you smile it brightens up my day’ in messy but readable writing. 

He’s arrives an half an hour before Mark gets to school to put the note in his locker. He’s scared out of his mind. what if Mark finds out it’s him? Will he hate him? Will he avoide him? Marks reading the letter as he enters the classroom. “Hyuck look someone left a love note in my locker” Mark says proudly showing the folded piece of paper in his hands as if its some sort of trophy. Donghyuck smiles at him but he thinks it’s more of a grimace than a smile. Mark doesn’t know it’s him. Shouldn’t he be happy about that?

Around the fourth letter Mark decides he wants to know who’s sending them. Donghyuck agreed to help solely because Mark said he’d buy him ice cream every day after school until they found out who it was. So they made a list of all the people it could be. They would compare the note writers handwriting to those of the names on the list. 

“Jaemin I need help” Donghyuck could hear his sigh over the phone “what’d you do this time?” “I may or may not have agreed to help Mark find out who’s writing the notes” Jaemin goes dead silent before “you fucked up” donghyuck sighs “I know but there’s nothing I can do now is there.”

Donghyuck was practicing writing with his left hand during science (because Marks needs to be able to read the letters) completely forgetting who sat beside him. “Hey Donghyuck” Marks voice sounded unsure “youre left handed writing looks exactly like the writing from the notes” Donghyuck froze. ‘Fuck’ he thought. “Where you the one writing them?” Donghyuck swears he’s about to reply but the bell rings and he packs up hastily before running out of the school not looking back to see if Mark was following him or not. 

He runs all the way home, locking himself in his room and cried. “He hates me now” he thought aloud “he’s probably disappointed it was me.” Donghyuck stays home the next day. 

Donghyuck hasn’t gone to school in three days and his mother is sick of him staying home so she forces him to go to school. Dread plagued him as he walks to his seat beside Mark in homeroom. He avoids eye contact completely, missing the way Mark stares at him for the whole class. At lunch he calls his mom to say he doesn’t feel well and she lets him come home again. He’s on his way to the door when someone grabs his arm. He turns around half expecting it to be Jaemin or Jeno or literary anyone else but not Mark. 

“What if I told you I liked the letters” he says voice small almost if he’s afraid that speaking to loud will scare Donghyuck off “what if I told you I hoped it was you all along” Donghyuck looks at him like he’s crazy “Mark you don’t need to pretend to like me” he says looking at the ground. Marks hand moves under his chin lifting his head up to face him with so much care. Almost as if Donghyucks glass. “I like you too Donghyuck” and Donghyucks still staring at him. “If this is a joke it’s really cruel Mark Lee” Mark laughs “its most certainly not a joke” Donghyuck smiles a glint in his eye “prove it” and then Marks kissing him arms moving to wrap around his waist as Donghyucks find their way to his neck. Its perfect, exactly what Donghyucks wanted for god knows how long until “fucking finally!” Jaemin yells Mark turns to glare at him. Donghyuck can’t help but giggle. 

Its been a month. A month of abandoned homework, a month of staying the night at each other’s houses, a month of the others calling them gross (mostly Jisung), but most importantly the best month of Donghyucks life and he gets to spend it with Mark. 

Theyre childhood friends turned lovers and Donghyuck couldn’t be happier. 

~~~

“So did you ever like Renjun?” Mark asks one night over Skype with the others “Its been a year and you bring this up now?” Donghyuck questions “no he didn’t he was just to much of a wimp to confess” Jaemin says earning a laugh from Mark and a glare from Donghyuck.

**Author's Note:**

> this wasnt written at 2 am so lets hope its better
> 
> I mostly wrote this to ask for forgiveness because my last fic sucked
> 
> twitter @/moominjunnie_


End file.
